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Good Grief: Life After Loss, Part 3 

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Losing Our Furry Friends

The conclusion of my “Good Grief” series seemed ideal in this issue featuring pets and their people. Paris Hilton lost her beloved chihuahua this year. In a farewell tribute on Instagram, the socialite wrote, “In 23 amazing years, she brought endless love, loyalty, and unforgettable moments to my life.” 

Some may not understand — eye rolls may ensue — but fellow pet people know all too well that losing a companion animal is just as heartbreaking as losing a human loved one. 

“The pain I feel right now is indescribable,” Hilton posted.

Yet our cultural playbook is devoid of any protocols for those mourning pets. There are no pet obituaries, no official rituals or religious ceremonies to support us through the loss of a fur baby. When such perfectly normal and deep emotions can be considered a mere overreaction by some people in our own tribe, one could argue that losing a pet is even more difficult. 

The ultimate interspecies bond

Though domestic companions can be scale or feather-covered too, I spoke to the bereaved owners of the furry variety.

Thousands of years of evolution have led to dogs morphing from the wild wolves they once were into man’s best friend, able to read our emotions and willing to sit, bark, roll over and play dead on command – all to please us. If you’re not a pet owner yourself, you’re sure to have friends with pets.

Max, tennis ball chaser extraordinaire 

Long before Matt and Faith Harding had children, they had their dogs, Jazzy and Max, who were part of their lives for over 11 years. Losing them was hard.

Matt Harding’s handsome boy, Max, who has crossed over the rainbow bridge.

“We lost Max and Jazzy within a year of each other. We had to put Jazzy down because she was older and suffering. It was the right thing to do. What made it more difficult with Max was that it was so unexpected,” Matt said.

The Hardings had been treating Max, who suffered from seizures common to Belgian Malinois. They were able to keep the seizures under control for years. 

What makes a grown man cry

It was a week like any other. Faith had gone out of town. The kids and Max were left in Matt’s care. Max chased tennis balls in the backyard. There were no warning signs that something was about to go terribly wrong. 

Man’s best friend – Matt Harding with his beloved pal, Maximus. Photo courtesy of Matt Harding.

Matt found Max in his kennel when he came home one evening. It looked as though he’d had a seizure — like those he’d recovered from many times before. Matt rinsed him off and brought him back inside.

When Matt came downstairs after putting his daughter down for a nap, Max drew his last couple of breaths and passed away. “He waited for me to come back,” Matt said.

Having to call Faith to share the sad news while she was traveling was heartbreaking. “After the initial shock and plenty of tears, you’re stuck with trying to figure out what to do next,” Matt said.

With their baby on one arm and their wailing toddler holding his hand, Matt walked the kids over to the neighbors’ house. The only thing he could utter was, “Please watch them.” Seeing his tear-streaked face, his neighbor took the children without hesitation. 

“I had to text her and let her know what was happening. I could not even get words out of my mouth. They were a huge help and very sympathetic to what was happening,” Matt shared.

Max

Maximize the memories

What helped the Hardings most was looking at pictures and reminiscing about their “incredible dog,” Max.

“He loved people. Plenty of people reached out to tell me some of their favorite memories with him and I couldn’t help but smile and laugh at how he left an impression on so many,” Matt said. 

Conversely, Matt viewed the act of putting away the dog beds, bowls and toys as an admission that Max was now just a memory. “I couldn’t bring myself to do it,” Matt confided.

“The loss of Max is still hard to think about. Faith and I budget. We have a line item for Max. We were doing the budget a couple of nights ago and couldn’t bring ourselves to remove him as a line item,” Matt said. “Thank you for letting me share our story.”

Triple grief

Before Sandra Hutto and her siblings could spread their parents’ ashes, she was faced with the sudden death of her 11-year-old Doberman, Rio.

Rio

Three losses in rapid succession were a hard knock-back for Hutto. She is grateful for supportive friends and being able to process her grief with the help of her husband Mark, a psychiatrist.

According to Hutto, sharing stories about her parents was as helpful in dealing with her loss as it was funny. “There were things I didn’t know. It was fascinating,” she said. “Family stories are important. Apparently, my mother was kind of a floozy,” she laughed.

Her aunt had shared about her mother misleading a boy to spend a day at the lake. When he asked her out, she claimed to have gotten a headache from all the sun. But later, she called another boy about going to a movie.  

Hutto advised, “You have shared stories and individual stories. You can let that isolate you or bring you closer. You could say, “That wasn’t my experience, I’m shutting it out,” but it lets you know more about your parents. They have stories from before you were born.”

Sandra Hutto’s late parents

Dad and the Doberman Pinscher

Before her father’s passing, Hutto and her husband took her dad on a road trip to Wyoming, along with Rio, in their 1993 Bluebird Wanderlodge to visit her sister. Unsure how her father would take to such a big dog, she was pleased when they bonded.

“He fell in love with her. Rio would get up in the middle of the night to lay down next to him. I joked with dad, “You know daddy, we do keep the dog.””

After he died, people said, “That trip was great for him. He never stopped talking about how much fun he had.” That was heartwarming,” Hutto said.

She danced on the sand

An American Kennel Club purebred dog, Rio’s registered name is, She Dances on the Sand, after the Duran Duran song.

Bred in Germany to be the intimidating protectors of tax collectors, Dobermans are strong, intelligent dogs, able to attack on command. Rio didn’t exactly fit the bill. Terrified of a neighborhood Yorkie, she’d watch him as she cowered behind Hutto.

Her tail was docked but she had natural, floppy ears. She wasn’t steely-looking, but she did have a big bark. “Mostly she would try to convince people that she was neglected. She was a drama queen; such a good, funny dog,” Hutto said. 

Rio and Sandra Hutto’s father bonding on a roadtrip

Déjà vu

Rio passed almost exactly the same way their previous Doberman, Jet had. (Jet was named after the Paul McCartney and Wings song.) Though Rio had a longer life, Hutto expressed the common sentiment among pet-owners: it’s never long enough. 

Rio had received a clean bill of health and a rabies shot that day. By the evening, she was restless and wouldn’t settle in her bed. Mark had gone out.  

“She got up and started walking around. She walked into our dining room, went around the table, her back feet collapsed from under her. She struggled to get up. She howled a couple of times and she was gone,” Hutto said.

Hutto believes cardiac arrhythmia killed both Jet and Rio. Heart issues are common in Dobermans, partly because of breeding and because they’re deep-chested dogs.

“Not again!” Hutto remembers shrieking as she witnessed Rio’s passing. Jet had passed away in the same manner, but she was with Mark. The swift but horrible departure allows for the only consolation, “at least she didn’t suffer.”  

Sandra Hutto

A Dobie’s departure

After the ordeal of burying 70-pound Jet in the rain, the Huttos decided to have Rio cremated. They were pleased with Deceased Pet Care, Inc. in Chamblee.

“They were kind, empathetic and respectful. They knew we were in pain. They took good care of her, made a point to tell us that they cremate each dog individually, and gave us her paw print in clay,” Hutto recounted. 

Walk alone

“Peachtree Forest is the neighborhood to live in if you want to come back as a dog. People here love their dogs. They’ll greet your dog — and then they’ll say hi to you,” Hutto chuckled. When neighbors learned about Rio’s passing, some sent sympathy cards. 

Hutto was almost thankful for a sprained knee shielding her for a while from the inevitable moment she takes her first walk alone and people will ask, “Where’s Rio?”

“I’ll probably bawl in the street,” she predicted.

Able to better prepare for losing her parents, Hutto remarked that her grief journey is different for Rio because it was so sudden. “It was a shock and harder in some ways. It’s important to talk about it so people see you can get through it,” she said. 

When they’re ready, the Huttos plan to get another Doberman. “I’m going to name her Roxanne. You’re not going to be able to help yourself when you call her. You’re going to have to do the song,” she said. 

Paw prints on our hearts

Pets are not “just animals,” as some may be tempted to say when we lose them. For those who form strong bonds with our four-legged friends, they become part of our favorite routines, our protégés, our sweetest companions, delighting us daily with joy and unconditional affection; they become family.

If the emotional connections we can form with pets are virtually indistinguishable from those we form with people, it stands to reason that pet bereavement can be on par with the grief we experience for our cherished, human loved ones. Let’s remember to be kind to those grieving the loss of their pets.

Patrizia hails from Toronto, Canada where she earned an Honors B.A. in French and Italian studies at York University, and a B.Ed. at the University of Toronto. This trilingual former French teacher has called Georgia home since 1998. She and her family have enjoyed living, working and playing in Peachtree Corners since 2013.

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Pest Control Without Harsh Chemicals

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Two men and one woman standing next to a blue SUV with company logo on it and holding a sign for Geo Mosquito.

Local small business owner has found a way to keep mosquitos at bay with natural remedies

Geoff Krstovic, a former firefighter, transitioned into the mosquito control business after a divorce, driven by the desire for flexible work.

“Nobody ever thinks they’re going to be into bugs and chemistry when they grow up,” he said. “It’s not like, ‘I want to be a firefighter. I want to be an astronaut.’ Nobody thinks that they want to go out there whacking bugs or says, ‘I want to be in pest control.’”

But as he progressed in his new career, Krstovic took an interest in how to get rid of pests without using harsh, man-made chemicals.

“The more certifications, the more promotions and everything that I got, [and] the more entomology classes I started taking, … I really started to realize what we were putting out into the environment,” he said.

Pest control technician from Geo Mosquito spraying a customer's yard.
Krstovic treating a customer’s yard. The spraying protocol is customized to each property, resulting in more effective mosquito control.

“I spend 90% of my time outside, and I see so much wildlife. So, when I would see a deer eating a leaf or a rabbit run out of bushes that I just treated, it really made me start to think about the effects of what we were doing to them.”

Not to mention pollinators like bees and butterflies.

“When I [would finish a treatment], I’d look back at the yard and everything that I’d seen flying around was just gone,” he said.

As a parent and a pet owner, he knew there had to be a better way to get rid of pests but still safeguard ourselves and the animals around us.

With a growing concern for the environmental impact, he developed a natural mosquito treatment system. The company he was working for wasn’t interested in his new product, so he started his own business.

Road to pest control

Krstovic graduated from Georgia State with a major in English. He joked that many of his contemporaries in the field have similar backgrounds.

“There’s an ongoing joke in the pest community where it’s like … what do you go to college [for] to be a pest [control] owner? Well, you major in liberal arts, English or writers’ composition,” he said.

Large orange and black butterfly resting on a pink flower bush with green leaves in a backyard garden.
Geo Mosquito protects vital plants and pollinators with eco-friendly mosquito control.

“A lot of the other owners I met had the same degrees. A big part of it is that creativity aspect, and in pest control, you’re allowed to think outside the box, and you’re allowed to adjust and adapt to what you’re seeing and use different methods.”

That desire to do things differently led him to find a way to help keep people safe from West Nile, Zika virus and Eastern equine encephalitis while they enjoyed time outdoors.

With a lot of research and a little help from relatives with backgrounds in chemistry and engineering, he came up with a formulation based on using essential oils.

The dangers of mosquitos

“After you meet your first client that tells you about their experience just walking to a mailbox and they get West Nile, it changes your perspective 100%,” Krstovic said, “because you’re not just out there killing bugs, you’re out there protecting people and their families.”

Mosquitos are often called the most dangerous animal on earth, with the diseases they spread killing over a million people annually according to statistics from the World Health Organization and Centers for Disease Control.

While the more serious mosquito diseases don’t pose the greatest risk to most communities, there are common ailments that can show up in people and pets, including bites that get infected and heartworm in dogs.

Reaching out to the community

Though people were a little skeptical about Krstovic’s natural pest control methods at first, Erin Rhatigan decided to give it a try.

“Geoff cold-called our house in 2021 and revealed that he actually grew up in the house next door,” she said. “He really wanted to return to his roots and offer his services.”

Rhatigan has three young children, and with her home being situated on the Chattahoochee River, the outdoor areas are beautiful, but also plagued by a lot of mosquitos.

“We’re very focused on spending time outside, and our kids are very, very active, so they’re outside a lot,” she said.

But Rhatigan and her kids are also very sensitive to mosquito bites, and the spraying services she tried year after year weren’t satisfactory.

“I had gone through every franchise. I had used the large companies every season. I was switching because it seemed like it would be effective at the beginning, and then it would lose effectiveness,” she said.

She was also concerned about the toxicity of the chemicals being used.

“I felt like using toxic chemicals on our property was not only bad for our family, but because we are on the river, we’re kind of a steward to the environment as well, … so when he mentioned that the product that he uses to control the mosquitoes was eco-friendly, I was happy to try it,” she shared.

Local solution gets a local investor

The treatment was so effective that Rhatigan isn’t just a customer, she and her husband decided to invest in the business.

A woman and two men sitting at a kitchen table with snacks, drinks and notebooks discussing plans for business expansion.
From left: Erin Rhatigan, Geoff Krstovic and Nathan Rhatigan mapping out 2025 expansion plans.

“It was better than anything I had used for the previous 10 years,” she said. “The amazing thing is that when he sprays the property, you have this effervescence of the essential oils in the air.”

She recommended Geo Mosquito to everyone who’d listen to her, and eventually Krstovic took over maintaining the facilities at Rhatigan’s community pool.

“[What he was doing] kind of piqued my husband’s and my interest because we were looking for a small business to invest in locally,” she said. “I’m now home with the kids, but I have a long career in sales, and my husband is in sales as well.”

Within a year, the couple became active investors.

“We love the origin story of this relationship because it’s reflective of how friendly and supportive the local business community is in Peachtree Corners,” she said.

Caring about the work

Krstovic attributes his success to caring about the work, attention to detail and understanding client needs. He doesn’t just spray the yard and leave; he has a system of mapping out problem areas and educating clients about prevention.

A pest control technician from Geo Mosquito talks to a woman wearing a red top and black pants on the steps leading up to her home's front door.
Krstovic with Geo Mosquito customer discussing potential problem areas on the property.

“We’re looking at anything that could hold a water source and eliminating that, asking our clients what time of the day they’re getting eaten up, what part of their body and what part of their yard,” he said.

“That helps us figure out the species of mosquito that’s attacking them, so we know where to target, because different species have different nesting sites.”

Growing the business

Geo Mosquito has begun working with Vox-pop-uli to upgrade their logo, website and promotional materials.

“Geoff is a typical entrepreneur — protective of what he’s doing,” Rhatigan said. “So going through the steps of changing the logo, coming up with a new tagline, starting to do some marketing, is both exciting and a little scary.”

But the team at Vox-pop-uli has been a tremendous resource — helping them go at their own pace.

“This first year of investment was about seeing what the market interest is and expanding brand awareness,” said Rhatigan. “Vox-pop-uli offers so many services, it’s daunting for an emerging company to manage so many different contractors: creative, graphic design, printing, mailing. But they have a great, responsive organization that has been very helpful.”

Next steps

With a proprietary formulation for the mosquito abatement, Geo Mosquito wants to bottle the solution and sell it nationally.

Additionally, in 2025, the company plans to expand into ecofriendly pest control services for inside the home. They are also interested in working with local municipalities, churches and schools to expand their mosquito control services.

The Local Thread: This business profile series is proudly supported by Vox-pop-uli, championing local stories and the communities we serve.

This article is also available in the print and digital edition of the Jan/Feb issue of Southwest Gwinnett magazine.

Photos courtesy of Geo Mosquito.

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Recreational Soccer Club Celebrates 50 Years of Play

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A group of kids, some in blue jerseys and some in red, playing soccer. Number 41 is kicking the ball towards the goal, where the other team's goalie waits.

According to physicians, educators and child psychologists, there are myriad reasons parents encourage their young children to play soccer:

  • Physical fitness: Soccer is a fast-paced sport that can help improve cardiovascular health, muscular strength, flexibility and endurance. 
  • Motor skills: Soccer involves running, kicking, dribbling and passing, which can help develop balance, agility and coordination. 
  • Socialization: Soccer can help children make friends from different backgrounds and cultures. 
  • Teamwork: Soccer is a team sport that teaches children the value of cooperation and working together towards a common goal. 
  • Life skills: Soccer can help children develop discipline, perseverance and resilience. 
  • Emotional intelligence: Soccer can help children develop empathy and emotional intelligence. 
  • Stress reduction: Playing soccer can help reduce stress and anxiety by releasing endorphins that elevate mood. 
  • Confidence: Consistent practice and dedication can help children build confidence and overcome obstacles. 
  • Gender equality: Participating in sports like soccer can help break down gender stereotypes. 
  • Enjoyment: Soccer can help encourage children to enjoy their childhood and stay in school.

It’s for those objectives and more that members of the Peachtree Corners Football Club (PCFC) are working so hard to sustain and grow their program.

Kids in blue jerseys playing soccer
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

A growing community

Nearly three years ago, three local parents had the idea to build an organization for their children to reap the benefits of recreational soccer.

“We found out that we were linked to the athletic club called Peachtree Booster Club,” said Gavin Meech, a club committee member, parent coach and member of the small group that revitalized the soccer program. “It’s sort of an overarching group that also looks after the roller hockey at Pinckneyville Park in Norcross.”

They realized that back in 1975, a youth soccer program called the Jones Bridge Soccer Club was formed at Jones Bridge Park. Now renamed the Peachtree Corners Football Club, the parents decided to put the time and energy into revitalizing — and growing — the decades-old program.

Kids playing in a soccer match, some in red jerseys and some in blue. They're running on the field and one has the ball.
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

In February 2022, the three coaches had 170 kids. The program now has nearly 300 kids across 30 teams. The club emphasizes community involvement, with over 5,000 volunteer hours annually from parents and coaches. Challenges include managing growth and ensuring sustainability, though the club aims to expand its field space and engage more local businesses for partnerships.

The organization will soon celebrate 50 years of providing youth recreational level soccer to the local community in the southwest corner of Gwinnett County. And registration for the upcoming season is nearly full, highlighting the need for continued community support and involvement.

Goalie on a youth soccer team, wearing a red jersey, blocking a soccer ball with his foot
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

Bringing new energy to an old club

Initially, the group faced challenges in forming the soccer club, including linking with the Peachtree Booster Club and learning administrative tasks.

“That first season was a steep learning curve, and we ended up, I think, with about 170 kids,” said Meech. “So we were driving around Peachtree Corners, sticking the little signs anywhere that we were legally allowed. A few of us were grabbing anybody that would slightly suggest they would help by being a parent coach and things like that.”

Fast forward to this past season where there were just under 300 kids and 30 teams.

Three kids in blue jerseys on a soccer field playing a match. The kid in front has their leg pulled back, getting ready to kick the ball.
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

“We are now oversubscribed,” he added. “Our return rate is in excess of 80% of the kids and their families. So, it’s really become something that once they join, they return, and through word of mouth, more want to join.”

The club is community-centric, with kids from local schools like Simpson, Berkeley Lake and Cornerstone taking part. Volunteers naturally step forward and get involved, with no formal process.

“[Rapid growth] is a great problem to have. So we’re working with [Gwinnett County Parks and Recreation] at the moment to try and see if we can gain more field space,” Meech said. “We started to utilize the big field near the Aquatic Center. It’s similar in size to Jones Bridge field, but it’s got a slightly different classification at the moment.”

Families sitting in outdoor chairs under umbrellas along the side of a soccer field, watching their kids play.
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

Right now, several clubs are using that space, so a huge obstacle is finding some place to play that’s local so that families won’t have to traipse all over the metro area.

“We don’t want to lose our identity by expanding too big, because that’s hard to manage,” he added.

Community engagement and future plans

Committee member Mathew Shamloo credits Meech with pulling him into the mix.

“I’d say that Gavin has a very unassuming gravitational pull,” he said. “There’s no real process to it. I think it’s just naturally the people who want to be involved step forward and, whether or not they are asked, they’re just kind of pulled in inch by inch.”

Shamloo is also a coach, but had no prior experience.

“I had no real ties to soccer before this,” he said. “My daughter wanted to play. My background is in basketball.”

So he utilized some of the fundamentals that apply to any team sport and researched best coaching practices.

“I want her to play soccer because it’s easily accessible, it’s local, it’s right around the corner from us,” he said. “It was like, ‘Hey, there’s soccer. We can start there.’”

Like most parents, Meech and Shamloo don’t have dreams that their kids will turn into David Beckham or Brandi Chastain. But if the kids have those aspirations, PCFC has ties to bigger opportunities.

“I think what we’ve managed to achieve is we have raised the bar on rec sports, and we are able to compete, but we’re fundamentally a rec club,” said Meech. “I think some of the challenges of the past [are] where you get to a point where you say, ‘Well, should we become an academy? Should we offer the next level of competition to the kids?’ But sort of the mentality we’ve had, and kind of our foundation, is no, that Peachtree Corners is a local rec club.”

In order to keep doing what they do in an amateur Ted Lasso fashion and stay around for another 50 years, the club focuses on community and engagement with local businesses for partnerships rather than sponsorships.

Youth soccer team with coaches holding up a giant cookie cake after a match
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

“Our soccer club and families are more than just a group of people that meet for our kids to play a sport,” said Meech. “Traditionally, you engage with local business for sponsorship, but we’re very lucky in the sense that, as a nonprofit supported by parks and rec with facilities, we don’t need a huge amount of sponsorship.”

Expanding the community

Soccer is easily accessible globally because all you need is a ball and a goal and some grass or something similar, so the costs are relatively low, he added.

“We’ve been able to engage with local restaurants, other sporting facilities and work in more of a partnership with them to create this wider community beyond Jones Bridge soccer playing fields,” he said.

Both men pointed out that they go to Town Center or other sporting events with their families and inevitably bump into Peachtree Corners FC players and family members everywhere.

Kids from opposing soccer teams lining up to high five each other after a match
photo courtesy of Peachtree Corners Football Club

“Local businesses reach out to us and try and find out how they can contribute,” said Meech.

Although the club is at capacity, it still invites families and businesses to visit and see the activities firsthand. The committee members want to build awareness and community involvement, as the club aims to continue growing and providing a positive experience for all involved while maintaining its community-centric focus.

For more information about the Peachtree Corners Football Club, visit pcfcsoccer.com.

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From Brooklyn to Belfast: A Peacemaker’s Story

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Man standing in replica of the oval office at The Carter Center

Many of us are consumed by the day-to-day of life’s hustle and bustle, doing our best to navigate our relationships, provide for our families and live comfortably. A select few meet with great success on all fronts.

Fewer still somehow manage to lead extraordinarily accomplished existences with gumption, energy and talent left to spare, positively impacting circles far larger than their own family unit. 

One such exceptional person, and longtime Peachtree Corners resident, is Jim Gaffey. Allow me to introduce you to the most extraordinary neighbor you never knew you had. I had the honor of speaking to him while he was spending time at his second home in the North Carolina mountains.

With a charming wife, thriving children and grandkids entering the fold, the former BellSouth executive is winning in the game of life. But it’s his heart for seeing others win that is something to behold.

He worked up from an entry-level installer pulling cables to a successful career in telecommunications, and from a first-generation Irish American teaching youngsters to read in Spanish Harlem to having a hand in peacemaking efforts in Northern Ireland.

With modesty, Gaffey would tell you that his work in Northern Ireland wasn’t remarkable because there were a plethora of well-funded protests taking place when he was a young man in the 1960s and 70s. I beg to differ.

Why The Troubles were troubling 

After gaining its independence in 1922, Ireland seceded from the United Kingdom to become the independent Irish Free State except for the six northeastern counties that comprise Northern Ireland, creating the partition of Ireland.

The Nationalists, largely Catholics, wanted Northern Ireland to become part of the republic of Ireland. The overwhelmingly Protestant Unionists wished to remain part of the United Kingdom. The violent sectarian conflict in Northern Ireland known as The Troubles erupted in 1968 after having been stoked by hundreds of years of tumultuous history.

protest march in new york city in the 1970s

Gaffey described the rather draconian, anti-Catholic situation, which he prefers to view through the lens of “the haves versus the have-nots” instead of joining the media in playing-up the battle of the religions. In truth, voting laws seemed fair; but in practice, they were very unfavorable to Catholics. 

Local voting was subject to property qualifications which made matters even worse. Business owners — disproportionately Protestant — who owned multiple properties got multiple votes.

“You had some people with no vote at all and some people with overloaded gerrymandering of the districts and sitting in parliament,” Gaffey said. This would ensure a Protestant majority in as many constituencies as possible.

Hence, in Northern Ireland, the religious makeup of your community determined the quality of your housing, public services and the jobs available to you. Peaceful protests were not kindly received.

Understandably, those who had enjoyed centuries of unfair advantages wanted to keep things just as they were. 

Brooklyn boy

The son of Irish immigrants, Gaffey was moved by the civil unrest going on across the pond. He authored an essay about the crisis while studying at City University of New York with a focus on the Special Powers Act passed by the Parliament of Northern Ireland in 1922. The act was meant to restore order but was ruthlessly used to suppress the Nationalists’ opposition to politics that significantly favored the Unionists.

Young man in a button-up shirt and leather jacket in the 1970s
Jim Gaffey at 27 years old

“The Special Powers Act allowed the authorities in Northern Ireland to arrest without charge and hold indefinitely up to six years without a trial or any kind of a court hearing. People were placed in concentration camp facilities,” Gaffey explained. 

The British Army began a policy of internment without trial in Northern Ireland in 1971 during Operation Demetrius which would last until 1975.

Skin in the game

In 1969, when Gaffey’s university paper was distributed to the head of the Transport Workers Union in New York City and to the National Council of Churches, it was decided he should be sent to Northern Ireland to learn what was going on and report back to the United States. The street smarts he’d acquired growing up in Brooklyn were about to be put to the test.

Gaffey first landed in Ireland on August 15, 1969 — the day after the British army had arrived. Armed only with legal writing pads, he was instructed to walk the streets, meet and live with the locals, observe, write weekly reports detailing his findings and send them through the postal system, as was customary then.

“When something big was happening, like the British army going into a certain area, we used telegrams,” he said.

Three white men wearing suits, standing together and smiling for the photo
Jim Gaffey with First Minister Peter Robinson (left) and Deputy First Minister Martin McGuinness (right)

“The Unionists began to attack and burn whole villages, trying to force out the Nationalists and stop the civil rights movement. The British government decided that too many people were being killed and driven out of their homes. Whole rows of homes were burnt down. All those families had to flee,” Gaffey said.

The U.S. didn’t want to interfere but craved a better understanding of what was going on with their close allies in the United Kingdom.

“People here, even people in Irish organizations, couldn’t understand why two Christian communities were attacking one another,” Gaffey explained.

Between 1968 and 1972, Gaffey traveled to Northern Ireland 12 times, living in both Unionist and Nationalist communities, learning from them. He shared what was unfolding with the U.S. by reporting to congressional officials and testifying to the House Foreign Affairs Committee.

An uncomfortable situation

Asked if he was fearful, Gaffey replied, “I was very cautious. I was stopped and frisked in the streets by British soldiers and held for a period of time until my paperwork could be approved by some officer at least 12 times,” he revealed. 

Anyone moving from one tiny community to the other in that area — no larger than Connecticut — or traveling with recognizable people as he was, was likely to be stopped, especially if they were obviously not dock workers or coal miners, the type of individuals one would expect to see there.

Two men standing in front of a small monument and fountain
Jim Gaffey with Nobel Laureate, the late John Hume. Hume won the award for peace negotiations with the IRA.

Observers knew to always carry their passports and visas, and say they were just visiting friends and relatives if questioned. “We were sent in with the cards of American diplomatic officials to call in case it got serious,” Gaffey said.

Gaffey recounts harrowing tales like that of the late John Hume being taken to meet the Irish Republican Army (IRA) in the trunk of a car to start the peace process because he wasn’t allowed to know where he was going. 

Hidden under a blanket is how Gaffey was once driven speedily across the border into the Republic of Ireland when violence broke out in Derry. Besides developing an instinct for knowing when it was time to leave, when he wasn’t evading hostilities, he found himself in discussions with very aggressive, angry people resisting the push for change. 

“Communities were devastated, people were beaten. It was a horrible situation,” Gaffey stated.

Forward, march!

“I was in three civil rights marches in Dungannon, Belfast and Londonderry: two in 1970 and one in 1971. I was pelted with rocks and stones by folks who did not like these marches in Northern Ireland,” Gaffey shared.

Just the thought of marching in such circumstances with 12 to 14,000 people organized by the Northern Ireland Civil Rights Association (NICRA) would strike terror in the hearts of most people. But men like Gaffey are a different breed.

“I was too busy ducking horse and cow manure to be terrified. When you were marching through these farmlands into cities where an election might be coming up, they got pretty feisty,” he said.

According to Gaffey, Nationalist chants were met with cries of “No surrender!” by Unionists who had a monopoly on everything.

— “We shall overcome!”

— “No surrender!”

— “We want jobs!”

— “No surrender!” 

When the guns came out and things got extremely violent, the observers were pulled out of Northern Ireland. 

After Ireland

What Gaffey had witnessed in Northern Ireland motivated him to help even more. He became the National Student Organizer of the National Association for Irish Justice (NAIJ) and traveled across the United States speaking at numerous universities including Yale, Harvard and Berkeley.

His goal? To educate students about what was going on in Northern Ireland and encourage them to become involved by protesting the blatant discrimination against the Catholics.

“We were the financial supporter in the United States for the NICRA who modeled themselves after the Civil Rights Movement in America,” Gaffey said. Able to garner support from the universities he visited, NAIJ chapters sprang up. Gaffey later served as the National Coordinator of the NAIJ.

Reprinted photo of Jim Gaffey and former first lady Laura Bush
Jim Gaffey with First Lady Laura Bush; photo courtesy of Jim Gaffey

As the Coordinator, Gaffey formally represented the NICRA in the United States at speaking engagements, public presentations and protests.

Over the years, Gaffey has met with four sitting U.S. Presidents about Northern Ireland: Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton, George W. and Laura Bush and Barack and Michelle Obama. He served on a committee of 20 charged with organizing the Obamas’ first trip to Ireland.

Luck of the Irish

John Lennon, who had participated in a march in London, backed the civil rights movement and supported the NICRA. Lennon attended NICRA meetings and spoke at rallies in the United States. Gaffey had dinners with both he and Yoko Ono

“He carried around our first son,” Gaffey beamed. “He was one of the most empathetic people I’ve ever met. Anything that was happening around him affected him emotionally, almost physically. When he was associated with us, he was taking in every bit of information,” he added.

Lennon and Ono wrote “The Luck of the Irish” in 1971, donating all proceeds from the song to Irish civil rights organizations in Ireland and New York. Other supporters of the cause were Arlo Guthrie and the group Peter, Paul and Mary, who entertained at rallies and fundraisers free of charge, as did Lennon.

The lyrics of U2’s signature song, “Sunday Bloody Sunday” evoke the horrors of one of the darkest days of the Troubles in Northern Ireland when British troops shot and killed 13 unarmed Roman Catholic civil rights supporters, injuring 14 others (one later died), during a protest march in Derry on Sunday, January 30, 1972.

The Good Friday Agreement

On April 10, 1998, Irish Nationalist politicians John Hume and David Trimble, the Northern Irish leader, steered the Protestant majority and their Catholic rivals into a peace deal known as The Good Friday Agreement.

“Unfortunately, Trimble doesn’t get a lot of play because his community hated him for doing it,” Gaffey said.

A signed copy of The Belfast Agreement
An original copy of the Good Friday Agreement

The Nobel Peace Prize was awarded jointly to Hume and Trimble that year “for their efforts to find a peaceful solution to the conflict in Northern Ireland.”

When it was all said and done, 3,720 people in a population of about 1.5 million were killed in Northern Ireland over a 30-year period during the Troubles.

With 21 miles of “peace walls,” separating Irish republican from British loyalist neighborhoods, increasing in number and size since the signing of the Good Friday Agreement, it’s clear there is ongoing turmoil. 

Martin Luther King III

In 2015, Gaffey was asked by those in Northern Ireland trying to settle things down to bring his friend Martin Luther King III with him to meet face-to-face with people on both sides. Gaffey followed through with King by his side.

“I think eventually, possibly within our lifetimes, we’ll witness the unification of Northern Ireland and Ireland into one country,” Gaffey stated. Despite the continued unrest, Gaffey maintains a vision of hope. Call it pollyannaish if you must, but I think I’ll join him in his prediction of a better tomorrow.

Avocation life

Gaffey discusses avocations like they’re as essential as breathing. I suspect he assumes we all partake in multiple activities in addition to our regular occupations. 

In 2002, he founded The Gaffey Group, an international trading company. He’s brought 47 companies out of Northern Ireland to the United States on trade missions. Today, he assists the successful ones by procuring investors.

A group of men in suits walking together and talking outdoors
Walking in Derry, Northern Ireland. Jim Gaffey (right) with his friend, Martin Luther King III and Martin McGuinness, former chief of staff for the IRA

“I’ve gone on trade missions to Northern Ireland with Governor Sonny Perdue and Lieutenant Governor Casey Cagle. I also took Governor Bob Riley of Alabama and a team on a trade mission there,” Gaffey said.

Gaffey serves on the Peace Harmony Joy Alliance which mirrors his own belief in leading a purposeful life. 

As an advisor to The Carter Center on conflict resolution, Gaffey has investigated third world and local issues. 

In case you were unaware that it might need saving, Gaffey serves on the ad hoc committee to save the Good Friday Agreement. Deeming it necessary for future success, he calls it a pressure group.

He explained, “It’s always in peril. Although everybody signed a peace agreement, they’ve found less than half of the weapons that were being used. There are still incidents. They’re still looking for people who were never found.” 

Leaving a legacy

Gaffey plans to donate an archive of over 300 documents to The Linen Hall, the oldest library in Belfast. His records of fundraising and support include financials, what they did, who they were raising money from, who they supported as well as communications addressed by leaders of the NICRA. 

Two men standing next to a white cushioned chair at The Carter Center
Speaking at The Carter Center on civil violence in our elections. Jim Gaffey (right) with Reverend Gary Mason from Northern Ireland.

“I can’t believe the news today,” Bono first crooned in the 1980s about the heightened conflict in early 1970s Northern Ireland. Regrettably, we can look at wars going on across the globe today and say the same.

It seems as long as humankind exists, so too will conflict. The only comfort is knowing there will also always be those upholding justice and equality. If you’re lucky enough to meet one such person committed to peace, seize the occasion to hear stories of hope that can emerge from even the deepest trenches of despair. 

There you have it, Peachtree Corners! I hope you’ve enjoyed meeting our very notable neighbor Jim Gaffey as much as I have.

This article originally ran in the October/November issue of Peachtree Corners Magazine. You can read the digital edition here.

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