Community
Good Grief: Life After Loss, Part 2
Traumatic Loss Spurs a Call to Action
Part 2 of 3
We sadly lost the legendary Tina Turner this year. The superstar didn’t fear death. She believed it was just part of life.
But what happens when death is not at all part of the natural order of things? What happens when a nine-year-old child loses her mommy at the hands of an ex-boyfriend, when a mother of three is senselessly murdered or when a son in the prime of his life is lost to a drug overdose?
These unspeakable tragedies led to the making of a grief and trauma counselor, a push towards legislation to protect drivers of ride-hailing apps and the launch of an organization aimed at saving lives.
“My mom was murdered when I was nine.”
When she was a little girl, Grief, Trauma and Domestic Violence Therapist Danielle Edwards went to school one morning, not knowing she’d never see her mother again. Her mother’s ex-boyfriend, Nat — whom Edwards knew well and had visited with — had been stalking her mother. He was a correctional officer.
A month prior, her mother was hospitalized after Nat assaulted her in front of their home. On the day Edwards’ mom went to get a protective order, Nat followed her to a friend’s house and shot both her and her friend to death.
The house was full of people when Edwards came in from playing that day; the pastor, the police, everyone was there except her mom. Her aunts were crying.
Even at such a tender age, Edwards was able to deduce her mother had been killed. Before her grandmother could share the sad news, Edwards asked, “Is she dead?”
A white rose represented her loss at the next Mother’s Day brunch, but Edwards did not receive any counseling. Though her grandmother had talked to her about going to see a “different kind of doctor,” her uncle didn’t feel therapy was necessary.
Adults ultimately make that call for children. Depending upon a family’s cultural views about psychotherapy, some children may be denied services that would undoubtedly be helpful.
Domestic violence and homicide
Imagine being haunted by thoughts of what the last moments were like for a relative who was murdered.
“Finding out your loved one died in a violent way is traumatic. It feels like a violation. Someone was taken from you. You don’t get to tie up loose ends or say good-bye. You can’t believe this horrible thing has happened,” Edwards shared.
Edwards was impacted by domestic violence and her mother’s homicide as well as the subsequent grief she experienced as a child but, unfortunately, did not receive any wrap-around services.
As a child, she didn’t ask a lot of questions. She understood her mother wasn’t coming back and remembers being unable to go to bed alone for a while.
“I don’t recall how I did immediately, but eventually I did fine. I remember looking up at the stars and asking God, “Why?” I wanted to call Heaven,” Edwards recounted.
Today, Edwards is part of the Georgia Murder/Suicide Response Network and proud of the progress the state is making to provide families with the tools necessary to process this very specific type of loss and grief.
“It felt like a natural progression from my own experiences to an interest in providing grief support to others,” she said.
Full circle
Thirty years after losing her mother, Edwards found herself sitting under those same stars, providing support to grieving kids at Camp MAGIK. “It felt like such a full circle moment for me,” she said.
Having seen how grief impacted her own family, Edwards is an advocate for kids receiving help. “I see it in the work I do at the grief camps. Survivors need support to navigate grief as a family particularly if there are children,” she said.
There’s now a program through the Georgia Commission on Family Violence focused on providing assistance to people impacted by domestic violence, murder and suicide.
Caught in the crossfire
A 31-year-old single mother of three trying to make ends meet, Lauren Allen lost her life to a shooter one night in Lithonia. Peachtree Corners Councilman Joe Sawyer and his wife Kim were alerted that something terrible had happened to their daughter on the evening of November 21, 2022.
A friend who regularly stayed on the phone with her for safety — they were both Lyft drivers — heard the moment Lauren was shot.
“I was nervous, in a panic, pacing the floor, trying to call around everywhere,” Kim said. “We tried to find out what was going on. The detectives confirmed her death at about 2 a.m.”
There was no getting close to the crime scene. The Sawyers relied on WSB-TV journalist Larry Spruill Jr. who was covering the story for information.
Lauren had dropped off a passenger who was disputing with the father of her children during the ride to his house. Seven months pregnant, the passenger was on her way to pick up her baby. She asked Lauren to wait for her.
“All we know is that the man came running out of the house, chasing the girl with a 22-assault rifle. He started shooting but she jumped back in the car, and they were able to get away. He chased them on foot.
“At some point, Lauren pulled over to call 911. It was dark. The man ran up to the passenger side and shot up the car. The passenger got away, but Lauren wasn’t able to; she was still in her seatbelt. She was found hanging out of her car door,” Councilman Sawyer shared.
Eyewitnesses reported seeing the car “light up with gunfire” and smoke pouring out of the vehicle when a door was opened. The shooter was later killed when officers returned fire at a nearby gas station.
“He didn’t know Lauren was a Lyft driver. She was just doing her job,” Councilman Sawyer said.
The Sawyers, tasked with cleaning out their daughter’s car, were able to count at least 18 bullet holes. They found a photograph of Lauren and her kids in the car. In Lauren’s place in the photo, there was just a bullet hole, but the children’s images remained intact.
Lauren was torn away from her children, family and friends forever because of a quarrel that had nothing to do with her.
The power of community
The social connections forged by the Sawyers during their 34 years together have helped to sustain them in many ways during their darkest hours. Family and friends flooded their home, so they were not alone when they received verification of their worst nightmare.
“There were probably 30 people here. When something happens, we’re all there — brothers, sisters, everybody,” Councilman Sawyer said.
Their church group, surrounding congregations, the City of Peachtree Corners and nearby municipalities reached out to them. Atlanta Mayor Andre Dickens had a proclamation honoring Lauren delivered to her viewing. His representatives were the first to arrive.
Crowell Brothers Funeral Home collected Lauren’s body from the coroner’s office and sheltered Kim from seeing her daughter before she was funeral ready. “I wanted to see her, but they told me to wait, not to see her like that,” Kim said.
One of her oldest friends saw to it that Lauren’s makeup was just right on the morning of the service. The family is grateful to the Senior Pastor of Peachtree Corners Baptist Church, Jay Hackett, for holding Lauren’s homegoing service where she was baptized.
“Grief is hard. Without the community it would’ve been a lot harder. We’ve had a meal train, donations to the Go Fund Me Account (gofund.me/28d0ee33). This made us feel loved. It’s meant a lot to us and helped us make it through,” Councilman Sawyer stated.
Keeping it together
With the help of a well-respected Peachtree Corners attorney, the Sawyers are seeking full custody of Lauren’s children by two different fathers, rather than splitting up the siblings. They had always taken care of their grandchildren, who range in age from 8 to 13, while Lauren worked.
It’s not an easy task for “Mimi” and “Papa” to care for three children but they wouldn’t have it any other way.
They feel it’s best to keep the children together, though one of the fathers is contesting it. “We’re not trying to keep him away. We want to keep her in an environment with her brother and sister. They’ve grown up together,” Councilman Sawyer said.
In the meantime, the children are in counseling. Kelsey and Kya go to Summit Counseling Center in John’s Creek. Kameron sees Jordan Yates, a licensed professional counselor (LPC) at Christ the King Lutheran Church.
The couple has been to grief counseling once but are challenged to find the time to return. They hope to join a church group in the fall.
When faith is rattled
According to Edwards, it’s not uncommon for bereaved individuals to wrestle with their spirituality. The grief counselor has witnessed people who hadn’t believed in a higher power begin to ponder the possibility after experiencing a loss. Conversely, she’s had clients with a previously ironclad belief system become upset and unsure following the loss of a loved one.
“If you were raised not to question your faith and suddenly you are questioning, you don’t know what to do with that. This is a place where you can talk about it. I’m not going to judge or tell you what to believe. I’m here to provide a space for you to work through whatever it is that’s coming up,” Edwards explained.
Councilman Sawyer found himself filled with hate for six months. “I hated the world. I was torn up, miserable. I couldn’t sleep. I stopped praying. I was too busy asking God why he took my daughter until my sister told me I needed to get rid of my anger because as I go, my family goes,” he said.
Then a friend in London called, urging him to let it go or he’d be consumed by hatred which would in turn, consume his family. When she prayed for him, it felt as though a weight had lifted. He instantly felt different.
That same day, Councilman Sawyer’s sister said, “I don’t know if you’re ready for this, but Lauren just crossed over. She went running to daddy, calling him “Papa”, and hugged him. Daddy was waiting on her in Heaven. Lauren didn’t want to leave you, Joe, because she knew you were in a bad spot.”
Brokenhearted herself, battling a stream of tears and trying to be strong, Kim was relieved when her spouse’s fury dissipated.
“Dealing with it and living with him was not very good. Thank goodness, it’s so much better,” she said. The couple believes things changed for the better because people were praying for them.
To each his own grief
Together they make a strong unit, but Councilman Sawyer and his wife have had some contrasting experiences. What is healing for one can be a trigger for the other. While Kim wishes to hear the 911 call made by Lauren for example, Councilman Sawyer does not.
Hearing “I’m sorry for your loss” is comforting to Kim who finds it difficult when people avoid discussing it. Councilman Sawyer prefers the remark from Senior Pastor of Northpoint Church, Andy Stanley: “I’m not going to say anything. I don’t have the words.”
While Kim is tormented about not having seen her daughter on that fateful day, Councilman Sawyer feels fortunate to have spent some quality father-daughter time with Lauren on the day of her shooting.
Everyone is distinct in their grieving. “It’s hard. You can be talking and all of a sudden you start crying. I see what Kim goes through. This has allowed us to spend more time together. Our marriage has gotten stronger,” Councilman Sawyer said.
Life-saving legislation
Hoping to lobby Georgia State Representatives Scott Hilton and Ruwa Romman, the Sawyers plan a push to have drivers of ride-hailing apps like Lyft and Uber be allowed to carry guns. They realize it’s a politically contentious issue.
According to Councilman Sawyer, it’s concerning that Georgia Governor Brian Kemp passed the permitless carry gun law in 2022, allowing citizens to carry handguns in public without a license or background check. The black community has the highest rate of gun deaths in America; he fears it will only increase as more states pass the same legislation.
The couple would rather see stronger licensing laws in place. They’re eager to work with both parties to achieve their goal. They don’t want what befell Lauren — being helpless in the face of a gunman, armed only with pepper spray — to happen to anyone else’s child.
The Sawyers cited a new Atlanta-based ride-sharing app (Black Wolf) that offers a bullet-proof SUV and armed drivers who are highly trained in security. They hope others will follow suit.
“Young people are buying guns. They don’t take classes. They’re going out and killing. It’s happening all over. It needs to be addressed,” Councilman Sawyer exclaimed. “These companies have to look out for their people. We’re arming the public. We have to make sure drivers are protected.”
To honor their daughter’s memory, the Sawyers have set their sights on getting what they hope to call “Lauren’s Law” sponsored, through the House of Representatives, and all the way to the governor’s desk. Fighting for the protection of these drivers is what they believe Lauren would want.
As they brace themselves to face life without her, Councilman Sawyer vowed, “I’m not gonna rest ‘til I get something done.”
Call 911
On April 14, 2022, Kathy Armistead also received an earth-shattering 2 a.m. phone call. “He’s gone,” her son’s friend said. Feeney was 33 years old. He’d gone out with a friend to get some cocaine, telling his girlfriend he’d be back soon.
When jovial, sports-loving, larger-than-life Feeney collapsed while using, his friend must’ve panicked. He didn’t administer CPR or call 911. Feeney died of cardiac arrest.
Armistead pieced a timeline together after emerging from having been frozen in grief for a month and was able to deduce that 30 to 40 minutes had lapsed before anyone dialed emergency services.
When the heart stops, the brain essentially dies after six minutes of oxygen deprivation. The hospital confirmed Feeney was brain-dead but because he was donating his body and organs, he was kept on a ventilator until they were ready to harvest everything usable the following day.
Feeney’s last act was one of the most generous conceivable; multiple recipients have benefitted from his life-saving organs and tissues.
“He was a force, a handsome, 6’3”, scruffy, mountainy-looking guy with a beard. He loved to let everyone know he was there and make everybody laugh. He was a live-life-to-the-fullest kind of guy,” Armistead beamed.
The hardest part of her loss is knowing that it didn’t have to happen. Feeney may have had a second chance at life had those around him acted quickly.
A mother’s good-bye
As she sat by his side in the hospital, Feeney appeared to be asleep. “He looked healthy, relaxed. He had just gotten back from the beach. He was laying like he would take a nap; his legs spread out,” Armistead recounted.
She was able to talk to him, scream at him, tell him how upset she was that he was leaving her this way. “I laughed and cried. It was really good for me, but some people didn’t look at it that way,” Armistead said.
The most majestic animal
As doctors pulled Feeney’s blanket off, Armistead spotted a bad tattoo on her son’s ankle — a giraffe. “I looked at Feeney and laughed, “What the hell is this?”
Friends provided the backstory. Feeney and some former colleagues had decided to get a tattoo. When they asked him what design he wanted, he replied, “I want a giraffe. Don’t you think it’s the most majestic animal in the world?” That sold them on the giraffe; they all got the same one.
Never having had a tattoo, Armistead chose to get one inked onto her own ankle in Feeney’s memory, but she opted for a more stylized giraffe drawn by her artistic mother.
“My daughter, my sister and I got one. Now I look down at my ankle and smile,” Armistead said.
Fred joins Feeney
Feeney’s dog, Fred, was at his funeral service roaming around greeting the attendees who came to pay their respects. A month later, Fred suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. It was another blow for the Armisteads, but they believe Feeney called him home.
At a loss for words
Edwards advises, “Let the bereaved person take the lead. If they want to talk about their loss, don’t change the subject. You don’t have to know what to say. You can just listen. If they don’t want to talk, don’t pry.”
Armistead is alarmed at how hesitant people of all ages are to talk about tragic deaths like drug overdoses, alcohol poisoning or car accidents involving driving under the influence. “It needs to be discussed, not silenced. If we’re quiet, it’ll keep happening,” she said.
Her 35-year-old niece has had 15 friends die since she graduated from college. A friend of Feeney’s shared that he’d been to four funerals the year Feeney passed. Armistead has a friend whose son attended eight funerals in his freshman year of college.
“What’s going on?! Nobody’s talking about it!” Armistead exclaimed.
Determined to break the silence, Armistead explained, “I give Feeney’s story body. I tell the truth about what happened. It makes a difference to the community and the world,” she said. Since risky behaviors are more common among youngsters who imagine themselves invincible, bringing awareness of potential consequences to this demographic is vital.
Realizing that others may be uncomfortable or unsure about how she’ll react, Armistead divulged how it’s awkward for a bereaved individual when nobody asks about it.
“They think I should be over this. That may or may not be true,” she acknowledged. When chatting with individuals who are mourning, Armistead suggests, “Don’t gloss over it.”
Guilt
What of the potential sense of shame associated with losing a child? “I think you’re guilty, no matter what, when your kid dies. It’s a fact. There’s guilt all around it, even if you had nothing to do with it,” Armistead shared.
Losing a child is the worst thing that could ever happen to someone in Armistead’s view, because it’s not the way life is supposed to go. She thanks God every day that she still has her daughter, Lia.
Kids may not comprehend how deeply connected parents are to them. “You have a heart string to each other. When you lose one, it’s just indescribable. It tears your heart apart,” Armistead sobbed.
Inertia was not an option if Armistead was to come through this tragedy. “Being active is a critical piece for me,” she said. “Even when he was in the hospital, I’d have to get out and walk.”
Determined to advocate for Feeney and ensure this doesn’t happen to others, Armistead’s beloved son was gone but her mission was born.
Founding the Feeney Legacy Project
Wishing to spare other parents from having to bear the loss of a child in this way, Armistead founded The Feeny Legacy Project (FLP). FLP is a growing grassroots, woman-led non-profit organization comprised of sisters, aunts and friends spanning in age from 13 to 85.
Launched on the first anniversary of Feeney’s death, the organization spreads awareness about the importance of calling first responders and administering CPR immediately to anyone in medical distress.
Some might hesitate to call 911 out of fear of incrimination for being high, intoxicated or in possession of illegal substances. FLP provides education about the Georgia Good Samaritan and 911 Amnesty Laws which protect those providing emergency care from being arrested. To learn more visit feeneylegacyproject.org.
“We want people to feel safe about calling 911,” Armistead said.
Some people may be unsure about how serious a medical emergency is and consider waiting it out, but acting quickly always results in the best chance of survival: Call 911, administer CPR, save a life.
No certificate needed
In January of this year, TV viewers witnessed a Buffalo Bills trainer jump into action and revive football player Damar Hamlin on the field by initiating CPR. But being someone’s lifesaver doesn’t require a trained professional or even a CPR certification.
FLP has looked to the good work of the American Heart Association and partnered with national organization Parent Heart Watch for accessible, inventive ways to demonstrate performing CPR. Chest compressions can be practiced on a roll of toilet paper!
“I love the idea of teaching everybody to be confident to do CPR — keep the rhythm going and don’t worry if it hurts, you’re saving someone’s life,” Armistead said.
Even if you have no idea what to do in a crisis, someone can walk you through the steps of performing CPR, if necessary, when you dial 911.
FLP is open to partnering with schools, clubs, Scouts, coaches and athletic teams to reach as many people as possible with its life-saving message.
Heartache help
The book “Finding Meaning” by David Kessler was a source of comfort for Armistead. It provides a roadmap to remembering those who have departed with more love than pain. “I hung onto that and learned a lot,” Armistead said.
For several months, she addressed daily journal entries to Feeney in the early morning hours from her porch.
In many cultures cardinals are regarded as messengers from Heaven, symbols that lost loved ones are near. Armistead talks to them as though they’re Feeney, alternating between telling him to stop messing with her, and thanking him for stopping by. She’s always delighted in collecting cardinal figurines and ornaments.
Crying wherever she was — in the grocery store for example — is something Armistead gave herself grace for in the early days. “I did what I had to do,” she said.
She and her husband, Chris, didn’t attempt to process their grief jointly. “It’s almost impossible to do. It doesn’t work,” she said. “The advice I got was: do your thing, let him do his. And that’s what we’ve done. We’ve worked in our own ways,” she shared. They both found grief counseling helpful.
Click here to read part one of “Good Grief: Life After Loss.”
Resources
Grief Support
- Support for Survivors of Murder-Suicides — gcfv.georgia.gov/ssms
- Support for Parents who Lost Children to Murder — pomc.org
- Support for Death after an Overdose — sadod.org
- Support for Death by Suicide — afsp.org
- Support for Parents who Lost Children — compassionatefriends.org
Children’s Grief Support
- Camp MAGIK (Mainly About Grief in Kids) — campmagik.org
The camp is free of charge. Children get a weekend of support surrounded by other grieving kids and licensed professionals facilitate groups. Caregivers can attend too.
- Kate’s Club — katesclub.org
The club brings grief groups to children 5-18 in Metro Atlanta and beyond.
This resource list is provided by:
Danielle Edwards, MSW, LCSW — Grief, Trauma and Domestic Violence Recovery
Edwards Psychotherapy and Consulting LLC.
470-668-5930, info@edwardspac.com
City of Peachtree Corners
From the Mayor: Let’s Get Growing – Welcoming the Peachtree Corners Garden Club
With such a botanical sounding name, it’s no wonder that residents of Peachtree Corners are looking to form a garden club. To see if the endeavor would take root, (see what we did there?) members of the Garden Club of Georgia (GCG) held an interest meeting on June 18 at City Hall.
Linda Doiron, third vice president for GCG, and Leanne Penman, chairman of the Norcross Garden Club, led the discussion by giving instructions on how to get started and answering questions about all aspects of membership.
“We have several Peachtree Corners members in our garden club in Norcross that I feel like there is a need here,” said Penman. “You guys have wonderful projects you can work on, so let’s make it a reality through unifying your city, conserving your resources and educating your citizens.”
GCG requirements
GCG requires at least 10 members to charter a club. Annual dues to GCG are $10 for each member, and clubs are allowed to decide what they want to charge for additional membership fees. Much like PTA programs, a portion of the dues goes to a national and state organization.
There is also a regional level comprised of the Deep South states (Alabama, Florida, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi and Tennessee) and district levels within each state. The configuration of the districts within the state is a little confusing, however.
Gwinnett County is part of the Laurel District that goes all the way to the Tennessee border. It includes counties such as Forsyth, Hall, Jackson and Barrow, which touch Gwinnett to the north and east, but not Fulton and DeKalb, which are much closer to Peachtree Corners.
Penman said Norcross petitioned GCG to allow them to be part of the Dogwood District that includes Fulton County and had no trouble getting permission.
“It is very structured, and that gives you a lot of benefits. You could form a local club. But with this structure, it ensures success,” said Penman. “It ensures opportunities. And because we have a lot of sharing going on, we suggest if you really want to give it your best effort, having this structure will help engage.”
Both Penman and Doiron agreed that it allows the club to be visible and that helps in finding worthwhile projects.
“We have found this project that’s really beneficial — a garden therapy project,” said Penman. “It may be at an assisted living facility, or we just visited an autism center that has a new, beautiful garden, but there’s just so many opportunities created from our structure and from the sharing.”
What does a garden club do?
The GCG clubs have three defined goals:
“The first goal is beautification, and it’s just to beautify areas and to make it inviting,” said Doiron. “Peachtree Corners already has beautiful plants to do that. The garden club can help with more of that.”
Conservation is the second goal.
“In that respect, one of our biggest conservation efforts right now is the Okefenokee Swamp,” said Doiron. “There’s a group from Alabama that’s trying to mine a certain part of the Okefenokee for a mineral called titanium oxide that’s only used as a paint brightener.”
Penman couldn’t mask her outrage.
“It only makes your whites whiter, and they’re going to destroy the blackwater swamp for that!” she said.
Both women explained that there’s a lot of local effort — much of it from the Garden Club of Georgia — that has enlisted the help of the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service who’s looking to extend the boundaries of the swamp an additional 22,000 acres.
This could lead to a potential buyout of the mining project or the establishment of conservation easements, allowing the agency to manage the land for conservation purposes.
“Another thing that happened from our efforts is that UNESCO (the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization) is in the process of confirming the Okefenokee Swamp as a World Heritage Site,” said Doiron. “That would protect it and make it similar to the Taj Mahal or the Galapagos Islands or the Great Wall of China.”
The club’s third goal is education.
“We have youth programs,” said Penman. “But we also have lots of courses on landscaping, environmental art, flower design. And you can go through that whole series of courses as a member.”
There are also various workshops on things like flower arranging and wreath making, as well as symposiums about subjects such as native plants and wildflowers.
Getting started
One of the attendees, Lori Van Duyne, volunteered to get things started. She’s a certified Master Gardener Extension Volunteer and helps coordinate and lead the garden club at Pinckneyville Middle School.
She has set up an email address and a Facebook page where announcements will be posted. She has also agreed to attend a leadership workshop set for June 25. Although she’ll be the “acting president” for now, Van Duyne said that other time commitments would preclude her from taking the position permanently.
Once the club is formed, there will be an election for leaders. Doiron and Penman emphasized that the president and the treasurer are the most vital in the beginning. And as it goes along, the club may choose its own main focus. Each club is fairly autonomous in that sense.
“You decide how you want to run your club,” said Penman. “At Norcross, we have an annual plant sale. That plant sale helps fund all of the initiatives through the Garden Club of Georgia that we wish to donate to.”
Club funding also comes from member dues and donations, with significant contributions to scholarships. Most clubs meet eight times a year, starting in September. Others take November and December off.
Both women emphasized the benefits of joining, including access to grants, educational resources and a structured hierarchy.
“We don’t always talk about growing plants, which is the main focus for our club,” said Penman. “Other clubs may decide to be an advocacy group. Another club may be focused on floral design. It’s really up to you, and you would put that in your mission statement for your garden club.”
What’s next?
A club meeting is currently scheduled for August 12th at 7:00 p.m. in Peachtree Corners.
Those interested should contact the tentatively named Peachtree Corners Garden Club at peachtreecornersgardenclub@gmail.com.
Van Duyne has also put together an interest form to get a feel for how members would like to run the club and what activities they’d like to focus on: forms.gle/oQ9VvLBPcXcLuVes9.
For updates, you can access club information on its Facebook page at facebook.com/people/Peachtree-Corners-Garden-Club/61577611141785.
Photos provided by Norcross Garden Club and Peachtree Corners Garden Club.
This story can be found in the July/August issue of Peachtree Corners Magazine.
Countries often have honorary consulates in major cities across the United States in the absence of embassies or consulate general offices. Heading them up are not career diplomats, but private citizens known as honorary consuls, selected to represent these foreign countries on a voluntary basis.
Besides attending embassy and consulate events, honorary consuls promote bilateral relations and educational ties, support citizens of the represented country and ease cultural and commercial exchanges. Some also assist with consular matters like emergencies, passport renewals and legal matters. Others focus on advocacy.
Close to home, I recently had the pleasure of meeting the honorary consuls of Monaco, the Czech Republic, Ghana and Barbados. I’m delighted to share their fascinating stories with you!
Doug Heckman
Peachtree Corners’ link to the Principality of Monaco
From a distinguished military career to the high-stakes world of finance, Doug Heckman‘s journey proves that it’s astounding where life can take you. When honeymooning in Monaco 43 years ago, the young lieutenant just out of West Point never could’ve dreamed that one day, from his Amberfield neighborhood, he’d represent the most exclusive playground of the rich and famous, the glamorous second-smallest country in the world, as Honorary Consul of Monaco.
A decorated career
Before embracing his diplomatic role, Heckman served an impressive 30 years in the U.S. Army, both active and reserve, as a Special Forces officer. His active duty tours took him to Germany and Fort Bragg, while reserve assignments saw him in special operations units across South America and the Middle East, including multiple tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.
A true patriot, Heckman retired as a colonel in 2011, earning accolades such as the Legion of Merit and three Bronze Stars. His extensive military background, which includes Special Forces, ranger and airborne (jumpmaster), as well as Expert Infantry and Combat Action badges, undoubtedly prepared him for diverse challenges.
Beyond his military prowess, Heckman carved out a 30-year career in investment management, culminating in a leadership position with Virtus Investment Partners and working with financial giants like Merrill Lynch.
The allure of Monaco
With the world’s shortest national coastline, Monaco’s total area spans only 514 acres. Yet the sovereign state is synonymous with luxury hotels, high-end shopping, opulent yachts dotting a breathtaking harbor, the Formula One Monaco Grand Prix and the world-famous Monte Carlo Casino. “They bat much bigger than their weight,” Heckman observed.
Monaco is known as a tax haven, attracting the wealthy and famous, including Formula One drivers and sports icons. As Heckman noted, “The tax structure is very friendly.” Since Monaco does not impose personal income tax, wealth tax or inheritance tax on residents, it’s an appealing location for high-net-worth individuals who are able to retain more of their earnings.
America’s fondness for Monaco can be traced to the 1950s when Hollywood star, Grace Kelly, left everything behind to marry Prince Rainier III.
From the U.S. military to Monaco
How did a seasoned American military officer and financial expert become an honorary consul of this European principality situated between the French and Italian Rivieras? Heckman explained that Monaco, a constitutional monarchy, established full diplomatic relations with the U.S. in 2006, eager to expand its global presence.
Heckman’s appointment came through a serendipitous connection with His Serene Highness Prince Albert II of Monaco. Serving on the West Point Board of Advisors, Heckman was asked to escort the prince during a visit to New York for UN Week in 2017. This interaction led to the ambassador’s offer for the retired colonel to take over the honorary consul role in Atlanta.
Despite not being a native Monégasque, his international experience and dedication to service made him an impeccable fit. “As far as the U.S. government is concerned you are a foreign agent of the country you represent,” he clarified, a responsibility he takes seriously, balancing his allegiance to Monaco with his unwavering commitment to the United States.
A fulfilling role
Heckman’s role isn’t a full-time job, but it’s undoubtedly a fun one. He emphasized that promoting Monaco is a joy, “If you’re representing a country, you hope it’s a good one,” he smiled. And a good one it is! Beyond promoting tourism and investment, Heckman’s duties include assisting Monégasque citizens who might encounter issues in the Southeast.
Cultural exchanges are facilitated by Heckman, who assisted in planning stops like Savannah, Disney World and Miami on the itinerary of the Monaco Boys Choir‘s East Coast tour last summer. Recently, he regaled a group from Emory’s Global MBA program visiting Monaco with a chance to meet Prince Albert.
While the position is unpaid, Heckman enjoys the camaraderie with eight other Honorary Consuls of Monaco across the U.S. “It’s a fun group to socialize with,” he shared, mentioning they are typically people of noteworthy standing in their communities.
Some of his eclectic counterparts are Jonathan Warren who runs the Liberace Museum in Las Vegas, Greg Lill, vineyard owner in Seattle and billionaire Dick Wolf in Los Angeles, creator of “Law and Order” and its many spin-offs.
Besides attending events like the Princess Grace Foundation Awards in New York or in Los Angeles, there are annual gatherings to stay updated on Monaco’s internal politics and plan joint initiatives. “We’ve become personal friends and communicate often,” Heckman shared.
Cross the entire country on foot!
For those dreaming of a trip to Monaco, Heckman is your go-to expert. He’s full of tips, from where to stay — “$500 gets you a nice hotel room in Monaco” outside of race week — to must-see attractions like the famous Grand Prix circuit, the spectacular aquarium, Musée Océanographique de Monaco and the iconic Casino de Monte-Carlo.
He’ll even tell you about Monaco’s surprising ventures into space technology, the Rolex Monte-Carlo Masters tennis tournaments and the glitzy Angel Film Awards.
Heckman continues to lead a charmed, multidimensional life. From military hero to financial rainmaker and now a diplomatic representative enjoying his retirement and traveling the world with his spouse, Patricia, Doug Heckman is a testament to embracing new adventures and serving with passion.
If you’re curious about the extravagant world of Monaco or simply want to chat with a fascinating individual, you can reach Honorary Consul, Doug Heckman by email at dougheckman2008@gmail.com.
Fun Monégasque Facts
- The royals in Monaco never become kings or queens. They remain princes and princesses. This practice dates to the 1200s when they didn’t want to offend the king of France whose protection they needed.
- Monaco is building into the Mediterranean to reclaim land from the sea.
- Want to move to Monaco? You’ll need to open a bank account depositing at least €500,000. Then, you’ll need to be able to afford the most expensive real estate in the world per square foot.
- Too small for an airport, Monaco is equipped with a heliport only. The nearest airport is the Nice Côte d’Azur Airport in France.
- The Monaco Grand Prix Formula One race takes place on the streets of Monaco. The narrow roads make passing difficult, so plans are brewing for a possible expansion that would allow for more overtakes, for the sheer thrill of sports fans.
Monika Vintrlikova
Between Prague and Peachtree Corners
In Lawrenceville resides a remarkable go-getter linking two worlds: Honorary Consul of the Czech Republic, Monika Vintrlikova. Her story is one of entrepreneurial spirit, community dedication and a deep-seated commitment to strengthening the ties between her homeland and her adopted American home.
The family business and diplomatic service
Vintrlikova’s path to becoming an honorary consul began in 2013 when she and her husband moved to Atlanta to establish the U.S. manufacturing arm of their family business, ALBAform, in Flowery Branch. Her parents founded the manufacturing company in the Czech Republic 35 years ago.
Emphasizing her appreciation for Gwinnett County, especially for its manufacturing environment and quality schools, Vintrlikova shared, “We found it, we love it. It’s a good place.”
Her honorary consul predecessor, George Novak, a gentleman who immigrated to Atlanta after the Soviet occupation of Czechoslovakia in 1968, approached her because of her support for the local Czech school. This cultural school, established by volunteers in 2013, aims to preserve the Czech language and culture for families in the Dunwoody, Sandy Springs, Marietta, Peachtree Corners and Johns Creek areas.
Novak, who had served as honorary consul since the 1996 Atlanta Olympics, recognized Vintrlikova’s dedication. In 2019, due to health reasons, he resigned and recommended her. “I knew exactly what I was getting into,” Monika said, reflecting on their close cooperation and friendship.
The diverse roles of an honorary consul
Vintrlikova’s role as honorary consul is multifaceted, encompassing three key areas.
• Consular Agenda —This is the core responsibility, authorized directly by the Czech Embassy in Washington D.C. Vintrlikova provides crucial support to Czech citizens living in Georgia and throughout the Southeast. Her main task involves notarizing Czech documents, a service that saves individuals considerable time and expense.
“They bring me powers of attorney, contracts when they are selling or buying real estate … We are making their life easier,” she explained.
Her official Czech Republic stamp eliminates the need for translations or apostilles. She also facilitates passport services and can issue emergency passports for urgent travel needs. Additionally, she helps with dual citizenship applications for American citizens with Czech heritage, guiding them through the necessary paperwork.
• Economic Diplomacy — Leveraging her manufacturing background, Vintrlikova actively promotes economic ties connecting her two worlds.
“I help Czech businesses come to the U.S. or Georgia businesses go abroad to the Czech Republic,” she said.
This involves organizing trade missions, connecting with companies at trade shows and accompanying the ambassador on visits to Czech businesses in Georgia. She views this as a natural extension of her own business interests.
• Public Diplomacy — This aspect focuses on cultivating Czech culture, connections and fostering exchanges. Whether it’s supporting a Czech movie at a European film festival or helping with student exchange programs like the one bringing Czech students to SCAD for summer seminars, Vintrlikova is dedicated. “I would like to get more exchanges going between universities. It’s connecting two worlds that I like,” she emphasized.
While her position is voluntary and unfunded, including office expenses and travel, Vintrlikova sees its immense potential.
Peachtree Corners: The new hub for Czechs
Vintrlikova recently moved her consular office to Peachtree Corners, drawn by the vibrant atmosphere of Atlanta Tech Park. “You could feel the energy of the ecosystem,” she said. This move positions her office alongside a new Czech business incubator, which she is actively promoting.
Despite a demanding schedule, splitting her time between the U.S. and the Czech Republic, Vintrlikova thrives in her role. “I like my life going back and forth. I like to keep the connections on both sides. It’s fun,” she concluded, emphasizing the warm, welcoming nature she finds in both her native and adopted “southeasts.”
Vintrlikova’s devotedness ensures that the Czech Republic has an effective advocate in the heart of Georgia.
Contact Monika Vintrlikova, Honorary Consul of the Czech Republic at 107 Technology Parkway, Suite 407 Atlanta Tech Park in Peachtree Corners or by phone at (404) 433-1400. Her email address is consul@czechconsulate.com.
Fun Czech Facts
- The word “robot” was coined by Czech writer, Karel Čapek.
- The Czech Republic is the world’s top consumer of beer per capita.
- Slovakia supported Hitler in WWII, which played a role in the initial dismemberment of Czechoslovakia in 1939. The split in 1993 into the Czech Republic and Slovakia resulted from a combination of economic, political and cultural factors. It was a peaceful event.
Yvonne Horsley McCowin
Deep roots in Ghana, strong bonds in Georgia
Born in Ghana, Yvonne Horsley McCowin moved to the United States as a child, growing up in Maryland and later Virginia. Her father, a diplomat and Minister of Information, instilled in her a global perspective and a commitment to service.
Though she’s lived in the U.S. for decades, Yvonne cherishes her Ghanaian heritage. “The minute I touched down in Ghana after 20 years, I felt instantly at home,” she recalled.
When Horsley McCowin stepped into her role last November as Georgia’s first Honorary Consul of Ghana, she wasn’t a stranger to serving her community. She had served for years as the President of the Ghana Council of Georgia. “I’ve always wanted to do something good for my country,” she said.
Her trailblazing journey began in 2015 when the Ghanaian president envisioned expanding honorary consulates across the United States. Yvonne knew she was the right candidate. What started as an uphill battle — years of proposals, resubmissions and government transitions — culminated in her appointment eight years later.
Reflecting on her perseverance, Horsley McCowin added, “It took a while, but persistence was key.”
From parking prowess to real estate enthusiast
Before diving into real estate, Horsley McCowin spent 25 years in the parking industry, managing customer relations and coordinating with city officials.
“Parking should be friendly, not free,” she remarked, recounting her experience bridging the gap between governments who appreciate the revenue stream and constituents who don’t love parking tickets.
Her pivot to real estate came during the COVID-19 pandemic. Now, she specializes in residential properties in Atlanta and surrounding areas, enjoying the direct relationship with clients.
“You’re helping folks; they’re happy, you’re happy — it’s win-win for all.”
Breaking barriers, building bridges
Being the first honorary consul comes with its challenges, but Horsley McCowin approaches them with determination and grace. Her role spans everything from facilitating visas and passport renewals to procuring legal guidance, connecting businesses and fostering economic and cultural exchanges.
“I’m trying to connect with businesses that might want to go to Ghana to invest,” she enthused. She’s hoping to negotiate a “sister airport deal” with Ghana and Atlanta’s airport. Tourism is also important to her.
“I’m a big proponent of seeing the world outside of where you live,” she stated, actively working on student exchange programs to offer young people a taste of Ghanaian culture and to foster global friendships. Similarly, she’s making efforts to send legislators from Georgia to Ghana and vice versa.
Celebrating Ghanaian culture and cuisine
Ask her about Ghana, and Horsley McCowin lights up with excitement. “Ghana is the friendliest country in Africa, and there’s no food like any Ghanaian dish,” she beamed. From jollof rice to fufu, Ghana’s culinary scene is rich and diverse.
She recommends local favorites in Atlanta, like Ike’s Cafe and Grill and Quabena’s Kitchen, where authentic Ghanaian flavors shine.
Summarizing Ghanaian hospitality with a fun tidbit, she revealed, “Ghana is the only place I know where you can show up uninvited to somebody’s house and they say, ‘Oh, here you are! Come on in.’”
Looking ahead
Honorary Consul of Ghana, Yvonne Horsley McCowin is an ardent advocate for Ghana, tirelessly working to create opportunities.
If you’re looking for assistance with travel to Ghana or curious about this vibrant West African nation, you can reach her office in Duluth at 3855 Postal Drive, Suite 100 or by phone at (770) 688-0245. You can also email her at yvonne@ghanaconsulateatlanta.com.
“I’m wholeheartedly trying to get people to visit or learn about Ghana,” she affirmed. And her dedication shines through in every interaction.
Fun Ghanaian Facts
- Ghana is a leading exporter of cocoa in the world.
- Ghana was the first country in sub-Saharan Africa to gain independence.
David Cutting
A life of global service: Honorary Consul of Barbados
Ever wondered what it’s like to promote a slice of Caribbean heaven on Earth? Just ask David Cutting, the Honorary Consul of Barbados. While music superstar Rihanna may be one of the best-known Barbadian ambassadors, Cutting has been on a decade-long escapade “promoting paradise,” as he so cheerfully puts it.
From international banker to diplomatic envoy
Cutting’s professional life is defined by a quarter-century of international banking while crisscrossing the globe.
“Fourteen of those years in Asia and 10 in Africa,” he recounted, with stops in bustling Hong Kong, Singapore and — as the CEO for Standard Chartered Bank — across Nigeria, Uganda and Botswana. His wife of 45 years, Heather, and their three children embraced the exposure to new countries and cultures with every move.
In a twist of fate, Cutting’s assignment to Nigeria meant he was in Lagos instead of the World Trade Center during the tragic events of 9/11.
After a distinguished career, he landed in Atlanta in 2011, making St Marlo Country Club in Duluth his home. His consulting business leverages his worldwide financial experience.
“I’m focusing on businesses interested in investing in emerging markets in Asia, Africa or the Caribbean,” he said, underscoring the importance of corporations including board members with residential and working experience in those markets.
Promoting paradise
The call to serve the country of Barbados came in 2015 when a friend, Dr. Edward Layne, who held the honorary consul position for 22 years, asked him to step into the role. Cutting did not hesitate to reconnect with his roots; it was a sort of homecoming for him.
“I have always felt like the prodigal son who left Barbados at the age of 18 … The honorary consul role gave me the opportunity to give back to my country,” he said.
“It is not painful to be responsible for promoting paradise. Barbados is not difficult to sell,” Cutting quipped. His mission? To showcase Barbados as a prime spot for both dazzling vacations and smart investments.
Tourism reigns supreme, drawing visitors to its rich history, stunning beaches and food, rum and jazz festivals, as well as to Crop Over festivities, Barbados’ version of Carnival.
Cutting is always eager to highlight Barbados’ robust international business platform, offering a “low tax environment” for savvy companies establishing a presence there, thanks to favorable dual taxation arrangements with over 40 countries.
Beyond the beaches
Cutting proudly declares Barbados “the gem of the Caribbean,” boasting its status as “one of the safest places” with a surprisingly high per-capita income for its cozy population of around 300,000.
The island nation, independent since 1966 and a republic since 2021, is always evolving. During the pandemic, Barbados innovated with a “12-month visa” for remote workers, proving you truly can conduct business “with a laptop on the beach.”
Beyond his promotional duties, Cutting serves as a crucial link for the Barbadian diaspora in Georgia. He works closely with local organizations and other honorary consuls in the Southeast. He also finds time to serve as treasurer on the board of the Atlanta Consular Corps.
“It’s important for us to share with each other. We’re all focused on the FIFA World Cup coming to Atlanta next year, working closely with the World Cup organization and the Metro Chamber to ensure visitors are properly accommodated and safe,” he shared.
A key initiative, “commercial diplomacy,” involves seeking business opportunities for Barbados, scholarship opportunities for Barbadian students and training programs in the hospitality sector.
“Barbados has a 98% literacy rate. It’s one of the highest literacy rates in the world. Education is hugely important to us,” he proudly stated.
Student exchange programs are prevalent. Globally recognized medical schools like Ross University School of Medicine attract American and other foreign students who don’t mind spending a term in Barbados where “it’s sunshine every day, the sea is blue, and the sand is white.”
To the Land of the Flying Fish!
Has Barbados piqued your interest? Contact the knowledgeable Honorary Consul, David Cutting by email at atlbarbadosconsulate@gmail.com or by phone at (678) 907-5887. He’ll be delighted to speak with you.
With direct flights from Atlanta, your journey to this coral island’s charm is closer than you think.
Fun Barbadian Facts
- Established in Barbados in 1703, Mount Gay Rum is the oldest running rum distillery.
- Barbados is the only place outside of the United States that George Washington ever visited. He accompanied his ailing brother there in 1751, hoping the warm weather would cure his tuberculosis. It did not. Washington contracted and survived smallpox during his stay, achieving immunity. That’s how he survived the smallpox outbreak during the Revolutionary War when many of his troops succumbed to the disease.
- Some of the first governors in the Carolinas were expatriate plantation owners from Barbados. Hence, the Gullah language spoken by the Gullah Geechee people of Georgia and the Carolinas shares linguistic connections with the Bajan dialect of Barbados.
- The banking industry in Barbados is largely dominated by Canadian banks.
- The Barbados dollar has a fixed exchange rate with the U.S. dollar. One U.S. dollar equals two Barbados dollars, every day, since 1975.
- Cou-cou, served with steamed or fried flying fish, is the national dish of Barbados. Similar to polenta, cou-cou is made with corn meal and okra. As one might imagine, Barbadian cuisine features fresh seafood.
Jewels of our community
Each of these private citizens shares a thrill in joining cultures, a story that is a testament to the power of international experience and, for most, the enduring call of one’s homeland.
As honorary consuls, they have an inherent desire to serve while championing the countries they represent at their own expense, ensuring their beauty and opportunities are known far and wide.
A version of this article can be found in the July/August issue of Peachtree Corners Magazine.
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